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Friday, February 20, 2009

How to Be Kind

Do you bite someone's head off once they start talking? Or do all your friends describe you as too mean? Well here I will tell you how to be kind.


1. Be Happy (not phony happy). Before you can be kind to others you have to be kind to yourself. Calling yourself fat or ugly makes you feel bad and you may want to criticize other people.

2. Avoid gossiping/spreading rumors about other people. If someone is being mean to another person like calling them stupid or fat try not to join in or even stand up for them. If your friends are teasing or gossiping about a person, give a non-confrontational defense--such as "She's always been nice to me"--or steer them away from that conversation topic.

3. Be a good listener. When talking to someone try to listen until they are done.

4. Compliment people on something they're wearing ("Oh, I love your shirt." Or, "Your shoes are awesome."). Try not to get jealous; if they know you're jealous it can cause an awkward moment. If someone compliments you, say thanks and continue what you were doing or compliment them in return.(Remember this person is trying to be nice and friendly towards you, perhaps wanting to be your friend.)

5. Be yourself. Kind people always are themselves and don't care if they look dumb while they are doing something.(Like laughing so hard they can't stop.)

6. Start each day with a plan. Think of what you would like to see and do. Then think of someone who is lonely. Someone who, perhaps lives alone, and has no family. Ask this person to join you, in your plan for the day. Share your time with them, ask them for lunch. This might be the highlight of their week. Be happy by making others happy.

7. Offer to pet sit, when you know a friend is going on vacation. If you know a neighbor is sick, ask them if they need groceries, when you go food shopping.

8. Stop and talk to someone who is lonely, share a cup of coffee and pick up the bill.

9. Whatever you say, whenever you say it, do so in a calm, polite voice that is respectful to the other side.

10. Help, even if you aren't asked. You should look around to see if someone needs help and help them without prompting. It can be a simple thing, to help someone with something that he seems to have difficulties in or something you think he needs or will need. Whenever you can, try to help someone else. It could be at their work (or homework), at relationships and more. If someone asks you something, never dismiss them but try to be as helpful as you can, even if you don't do what they asked. You can suggest to another to do what they wanted or point out who can help them.

11. Make it a hobby to try every once in a while volunteer somewhere or do something really nice for other people.

12. Don't try to take credit when you're nice. There is a lot of satisfaction in watching someone do something because you've helped him when he doesn't know he's been helped.

13. Adopt pets, it is an excellent exercise at kindness, plus it is being kind to help an animal. You can even "adopt temporarily" by offering to foster an animal and help socialize it so that it can be permanently adopted by a family or other person.

14. Good thought--even you did not do anything, sending caring and compassion thoughts to others around is one kind of good deed.

15. If someone is upset, comfort them. Offer them gum and give them a hug. Ask them if they would like to talk about it. If they have fallen out with someone, hear both sides of the story before picking sides and do not annoy them if they want to talk in private.


· Don't think only of the short term. The kind acts you perform today may teach someone to do kind acts for others - they will learn by your example, and because they were the recipient of kindness.

· You might not like everyone, and that's normal. Even the nicest person on earth get annoyed! Just continue be polite nonetheless.

· When someone drops something, help them pick it up.

· If someone you do not know smiles at you, don't hesitate to smile back. It's a kind gesture.


· If someone compliments you on something that makes you feel uncomfortable try to ignore him/her. If he/she keeps bothering you, go to your friends for protection or if it is at school, tell the teacher.